First, a quick dip into this scripture or we’ll be here all day.
“Three times I pleaded”
Three is a significant number in scripture. in this case it represents Paul’s long battle to pray-away his pain— probably years. By writing “three times” it should be understood he meant “what seemed like forever”. In the scripture he calls his affliction a “thorn” but, the slightest imagination would reveal this “thorn” was a significant ailment. Paul writes like me, a little allegory, a little hyperbole, a little sarcasm. Timed right, the message can be more easily relational to the reader. So, think “thorn” = “my whole body is on fire” for the sake of this discussion.
God: “Sorry Paul, my Grace is sufficient for you”
Not the answer most of us want to hear, but it makes a lot of sense— especially if we are not at that moment grounded in faith. Our ailment forces us to practice faith. Grace means “simple elegance in our movements.” God is telling Paul, “Yo buddy— it’s simple, you have pain so then you will seek answers from me. You will grow and then be able to lead others on the path. A path toward inner, and eternal strength. With love and empathy for all.”
“That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weakness for it makes me strong [in faith]”
Paul’s surrender is NOT one of “shucks”, I’m doomed”. Instead, it’s one of enlightenment. A recognition that his pain delivers him closer to God.
What this verse teaches:
Even spiritual A-listers like Paul get desperate. Paul who heals the sick himself, couldn’t fix his own problem. Ministry doesn’t promise you won’t be vulnerable. It likely makes you more vulnerable so you can speak with authority on your path.
Prayer isn’t a magic vending machine. Paul repeated his requests. God said, “you don’t need to understand why I’m letting you endure this.” The reason why was revealed to Paul by the experience through prayer, not by a text message description from God.
Intimacy grows in repeated prayer. It is a language of someone who refuses to give up easily but trusts God's agenda no matter what.
We often pray for God to take away the pain, the diagnosis, the difficult person, the anxiety, the financial strain, the past. Sometimes he does but more often he doesn’t. I’m certain this is to strengthen us inside the struggle instead of removing the struggle itself. It’s formation despite the struggle.
Oh heck! There it is again! The same message every one of these emails is concluding with!! It’s not about removing the struggle; it’s about finding peace and grace through the struggle!
I have to add; the anxiety one above is an exception— that one gets healed all the time— just do a simple search. People have testimony of depression and anxiety being completely removed from their lives through prayer. It’s the most common “miracle” described all over the Internet.
Okay, scripture time can be checked off. Let’s change it up a little bit:
Long-term burning conditions, like arthritis, have a funny way of dragging our soul into conversations it might have avoided when life felt easy. It’s where our faith collides with biology, where our pain becomes our teacher.
Ailments like arthritis do not just whisper— they often roar. I hear my wife’s cries walking up the stairs each night. She has to slooooow down to get up those stairs. For you that have afflictions like this, that slowdown has a purpose. It is a space, an opportunity, to reflect and to pray; to be patient. It is an opportunity to discover what really matters.
In all religious or faith traditions pain is a classroom. The Christian finds grace, the Buddhist finds compassion, the Orthodox Jew finds identity.
***The Big Reveal***
Every step taken through pain is a prayer for good or otherwise— whether you know it or not! Every morning you awake to loosen up those joints it is perseverance in motion. It’s “I want to live!” Some worship is singing but more often worship is simply just standing up! On the other hand, if we say the opposite, I pray that you do not, “I don’t want to live like this”, you have prayed for the worst outcome. Be careful what you say about your suffering!!
So, what I am saying is when you are feeling pain, you need to check your language. Are you crying foul or are you praising strength?
If you are complaining, you aren’t being graceful. If you are swearing, you are telling the universe to take a hike, God’s universe! You are isolating yourself. You are creating the very condition that the suffering thrives in. Your language around the pain needs to change— as Paul says, “for Christ’s sake, I delight in weakness, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, I am strong!”.
Paul is taking all the power away from the affliction by this statement. This will for certain lead to healing!!
Use the pain for purpose:
What is this pain teaching me right now?
Where do I need to slow down in my life and just be with God?
How do I transform this pain into empathy and love for others?
What judgments am I making against God’s creation?
What is within me, and me alone, that is holding me back from Grace?
Thank you for this suffering it kind of sucks but it’s making me ask the right questions!
What NOT to do:
Do not compare your pain to another’s. That’s an instant two-step back moment and will cause separation from one another!
Do not answer the rhetorical “Are you okay?” with, “No, I’m really in pain”. Rather, respond with resolve and strength, “I’ll get through this!” They can see you are in pain, why have two of you agree on a future that harvests continued pain.
Do not respond to someone else’s proclamation of personal suffering by telling them about your suffering, unless asked. That’s another way of breaking rule #1.
Do not seek recognition from casual witnesses of your suffering. Doing so brings suffering to whomever you are talking with. They will likely feel powerless to help you and may even avoid you! That’s not helpful! The misery loves company thing is WAY overrated! Check in with yourself, are you seeking recognition by your body language? Don’t!
Do not over-medicate your suffering. The doctors will hopefully prescribe only what is necessary— going beyond could lead to more suffering— especially psychotropic medications.
Regarding #5, I will say it again. I promise you that anxiety and depression are conditions that God will heal almost always— God needs you clear of mind! Keep working at it!
Some have said chronic pain, in particular, has these mental and spiritual elements attached to them:
Resistance:
an unwillingness to change or allow change. Stubbornness.
Self-judgment:
This is the “I’m not good enough” argument you have with yourself.
Unhealthy mindset:
Pride, ego, judgment, difficulty expressing true love or empathy toward others.
Unresolved emotions:
Not forgiving past transgressions. Holding on to resentment (a big one), anger, or criticism.
If it were me, I’d look deeply at this list and even go so far as to ask someone I trust which of these they might see in me. You likely don’t realize you are falling into any of these traps so ask someone else if you are. I’d then work on it even if I didn’t believe or agree with their assessment— a real friend will be honest. Our ego tends to lie to us.
In the scripture in the title, God isn’t telling Paul it is written in stone that he must suffer. Maybe Paul is missing the point, although I doubt it, which likely is God saying, “You want to heal? Then find me, really find me. Until then, I’ve given you this GIFT of pain to remind you that you have more work to do! I have a higher calling for you and this experience you are going through will make all the difference in what you will offer down the road!”
That brings up one final but serious thought. Some folks decide to cast out their Faith proclaiming it doesn’t seem to help anything. Guess what, God ain’t going anywhere and his feelings won’t be hurt. He will be sad for you because what you are doing is being reverting back to the needy and selfish child in you. “I’m not going to be his friend because he didn’t share his jellybeans with me, jerk!” All you are doing is delaying your progress. Placing your Soul’s journey in a holding pattern. It’s you challenging God to prove it. It is attempted coercion at the cosmic level PROVING you need to work on yourself. Have your moment, if you must, but return quickly.
…then…
Find a way to dance through the pain— by “dance” I mean do it within your heart. Recognize that the struggle can build an indestructible foundation for your Soul! Try to see your struggle as a gift from God who is likely letting you know he seeks you for a higher purpose and wants you to come closer!
