What about Me?
I know these can get long— I appreciate you spending even a few seconds on them. Truth be told, I get a lot out of writing them. This one in particular.
If you have a topic you would like me to try to resolve through scripture, love, and hopefully wisdom, let me know. Completely anonymous… Just add and click below:
🌎 The World Before the Word
A story:
It wasn’t dramatic.
Your name simply wasn’t mentioned.
The project succeeded. The meeting wrapped. Gratitude was expressed.
Just not toward you.
You felt it immediately — that quiet drop in the stomach.
Not rage. not jealousy.. Something else..
Just the subtle ache of being unseen.
You told yourself it didn’t matter. You’re not doing this for applause.
And yet, driving home, you replayed it.
The hours you invested.
The ideas you carried.
The quiet labor no one noticed.
It wasn’t about credit.
It was about being known.
This scenario plays out in many ways. You are excited to share something that makes your heart rise but your audience is aloof— or worse, “maybe later”.
The item being shown wasn’t the only thing you wanted recognized. You wanted to be recognized for discovering it. Both you and the content are reduced.
Try not to cross this threshold of emotion— the next level takes you into darker places and your need for recognition follows you.
The Old Reflex
The old reflex whispers:
Make yourself more visible.
Mention your contribution.
Correct the omission.
The event makes you plan for the future— “I’ll be sure to be more out front, more outspoken.” If you hold on to the thought of not being recognized, you start to advertise your contributions. Careful, doing so may have greater consequences.
In tribal societies, invisibility was dangerous.
If your value wasn’t recognized, your place could weaken.
In some places being recognized can bite you in the rear. In Marine bootcamp I was considered a “stealth” private. I did my job but stood out only in areas difficult for me to mask. Like my high physical fitness scores. Nope— no laughing emoji here— it was true.
I’ll never forget some weeks into bootcamp, our Drill Instructor (Seargent Hertz— yea, perfect name) faced me and yelled in my face, “Who the hell are you private?? You're a spy!”
Then, “Looks like we got us a ‘stealth’ recruit fellas.” I got extra recognition after that. From then on, I realized recognition wasn’t always a good thing.
Still, the nervous system reacts to oversight as threat.
It interprets silence as “cancel”.
The reflex is real— we all have it.
It’s survival wiring saying, “Secure your position.”
It’s part of our DNA. You aren’t wrong to feel the need for it.
…but it doesn’t serve you as much as your system suggests it does.
🌿 The new Covenant Posture
A living sacrifice does not perform to remain seen.
It is already seen.
Under the New Covenant, recognition is not the source of identity.
The Father who sees in secret holds that role. But he isn’t sitting visibly at the conference table.
This posture does not deny the sting.
It simply refuses to build a self-defense structure around it.
You release:
The urge to subtly self-advertise
The need to balance the acknowledgment ledger
The fear that invisibility equals insignificance
It is anchored in Christ.
You remain steady because your visibility is not decided in conference rooms or at home when you vacuumed, did the dishes, cleaned the bathroom and someone didn’t notice. That never happens in my house— I always recognize my wife for those things. 😍
📜 The Word
“Your Father who sees in secret will reward you.”
📖 Matthew 6:4
Jesus speaks these words during the Sermon on the Mount, confronting public displays of righteousness common in first-century religious culture— and still today.
Specifically, this verse speaks of tithes and alms. That some were giving like “stage actors” flaunting their celebrity… in the verse before he used the Greek word for “stage actors” specifically (translated now to “hypocrites”).
— oh wait, reminds me of a fun little song...
You can listen here— it plays off this specific scripture. Super short: https://www.witnessv2.net/music/giving-up.mp3
Okay— I love this. It’s perfect for this. Here are some of the lyrics:
“Yeah, I'm dropping bills in a play like ‘look at me’. Side eyed a dude in the back row, hoodie in the brie. Man smell like Tuesday, pockets say broke, I give a little louder, let the envelope choke.
I'm generous publicly, humble internally, posting my obedience, check my morality. Boy judge him like ‘bro! you should manage your funds’, why like you got leftovers and call it a run?
Wait, hold up, rewind that scene, heart too loud, motive unclean. I'm flexing faith like it's social clout, that ain't what the kingdom's talking about.”
📖 Giving-Up
Jesus mentioned people sounding trumpets in the streets. Whether literal or metaphorical, it refers to amplifying the noise of the gift. In the Temple, the offering receptacles were shaped like trumpets (so I’m told, I couldn’t find a image reference). Dropping heavy coins made a loud "clink-clink-clink," while a poor person’s small copper was silent. The "envelope choke"— putting your tithe conveniently in an envelope and making a scene as you put it in the tithe slot at church— is the modern-day equivalent of making sure everyone hears the "thud" of your contribution.
(this is gonna spawn a whole ‘nother writing today, I can feel it!! Onward for now— maybe in the pastoral section)
Some might say— if 6:4 says “give in secret— don’t boast”, what does Jesus mean in 5:16?
“In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.”
📖 Matthew 5:16
What the heck Matt!? You transcribe that right— they seem to be in conflict.
Yes, he did—mean it. They suggest the same thing. Actually, the first (5:16) defines the second (6:4). Your LIGHT is not an act. When you are aligned, your light is bright. If you overcome that need to be recognized, you shine brighter and it can be witnessed by others.
The unseen life is not forgotten in heaven. Your light is not a “thing” you ask to be recognized. It isn’t your “works”— it’s your inner posture that is seen by God, and by design, hopefully by your peers because you didn’t boast!
His emphasis is not on suppressing good works — but purifying motive. The song above speaks to it perfectly.
God’s attention is not captured by volume.
Why it Matters
Jesus was essentially saying that piety is not a spectator sport. If the motivation for a good deed is the dopamine hit of being noticed, the deed loses its spiritual value. He was calling for an "audience of One."
These acts of boasting "(“look at me”) are the result of that feeling discussed earlier of not being recognized in other areas of our lives. If you are aware that you do this, again, you aren’t evil— you are just playing out a natural condition we have built into our DNA.
….so, think about that the next time you feel unrecognized or a need to be recognized…
🤵 Pastoral Word
If you liked the "envelope choke" imagery above, you’re going to love how Jesus handles the "Prayer Performers." This is all in Matthew 6:5-8.
Jesus sets his sights on the people who treat prayer like a Broadway audition— looking for recognition.
I don’t know about you— the best prayers I hear sound like a conversation. My buddy Susan knocked one out of the park on the Tuesday night prayer call. A little recognition irony there— she’s solid so it’s not contrived, it’s well deserved.
The "Stage" of Prayer
Jesus says:
"And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by others." (Matthew 6:5)
Back then there were set times for prayer (like the 3:00 PM afternoon prayer or something). The "pro" move for a hypocrite was to make sure they were in the most congested traffic area exactly when the clock struck prayer time.
Imagine someone "accidentally" getting stuck in the middle of a busy crosswalk right as the prayer bell rings. They have no choice but to stop, raise their hands, and drop some 1-dollar per word theology on the passersby.
Funny paradox— you likely don’t want to give in that situation, but you felt some physiological tug to be recognized in doing so— or negative recognition if you didn’t.
What is Jesus suggesting about prayer here?
The "Vain Repetition" (The Word Count): Jesus mocks those who think they’ll be heard because of their "many words." In Greek, it's battalogeō—literally "babbling". 😂 It’s the spiritual version of trying to hit a word count on an essay by using a thesaurus on every third word. I’m guilty of this myself. sometimes.
The "Closet" Command: Jesus says, "Go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father." The word for "room" (tameion) meant storage closet or a windowless inner chamber— the translations just don’t give the same snarky vibe that Jesus was going for— I think we were ripped off.
The Wit: Jesus is saying: "If you really want to talk to God, go somewhere so boring and private that no one—not even your cat—can give you a 'like' for it."
Yea— prayer is perfect when it is simple, quiet, intimate, and honest. Having said that, when it has a positive impact— share it!
The "Father Knows" Factor
Jesus drops a heavy truth in verse 8: "Your Father knows what you need before you ask him." (HE RECOGNIZES YOU!)
This is the ultimate "ego-check." If God already knows, then prayer isn't about informing God or impressing the neighbors; it’s about inviting God into your internal space.
The "Next Act"
Jesus doesn't stop at prayer. He finishes this "Hypocrisy Trilogy" with Fasting.
Back then, if you were fasting, the "pious" thing to do was to look as miserable as possible—unwashed hair, somber face, maybe a little ash on the forehead—so everyone would say, "Wow, look how spiritually burdened they are." I have a Coptic Christian friend that used to wear me out on this one. He’d make me hungry around lent so I didn’t have to force it upon myself! Good guy!
Jesus basically tells them: "Wash your face and put on some cologne so nobody knows you're hungry except God."
🙏 Let's Pray
You are not fading.
You are not disappearing.
The absence of applause does not mean the absence of worth.
The God who formed you
does not overlook faithfulness.
May you work today without the strain of self-promotion.
May you serve without calculating return.
May you trust that what is planted in quiet soil
still grows.
You are not sustained by visibility.
You are sustained by being known.
Walk forward steady.
Nothing faithful is wasted.
Amen
🔥 Carry this With You Today
I am seen, even when I am not recognized.